Expectations March 12, 2011

Trust.  There is five
letters in this word. It’s a very small and simple word which is considered to
hold deep meanings behind it, Deep meanings that seem to be meaningless in today’s
world. The word is handed around like a toy. Many don’t agree with me and then
there are some that understand the perspective I’m speaking from but no one
really digs into the idea of why I conclude to this. My conclusion ends with
the answer of the surrounding of people I have come across. I am ok with people
thinking my opinion seeming negative but the truth is at the end of the day
there is no one you can rely on but yourself. As people have noticed even your
shadow leaves your side. At one point or another, the one you least expect can
leave you alone at the end of the tunnel. Negative? No, this is reality. Of
course this is my own opinion that I have perceived but this is what I have
realized the more I grew as a person. It’s not a hateful understanding but
rather a small wakeup call inside to trust in oneself and not hold expectation from
others, so when the fall through does occur you can only hold it together. Love
surely does probably exist somewhere but to sit there and trust one guy or girl
will die for you is absurd. To expect a friend will take a bullet for you is ridiculous.
Now key word I said expect before any misunderstanding occur for people, I am
sure there are people out there that might do that but don’t expect or trust on it.
The problem is we make our life so complicated by believing in this made up
fairytale world that we lose the real focus of the big picture…that there is no
big picture, It’s just you at the end of the day. You come alone and you go
alone, so why do we stand there trying to make others be the reason for our achievements
or failure. Expect but enough to keep yourself together and not to the level in
which you are breakable. Learn to trust yourself and expect from your own self.
I was asked by someone who do I look up to? My answer?  The man above and no one else. Growing up I
would watch my parents, brothers, and family the way they took this life but I
never looked up to them or wanted to be just like them. I admired their strengths,
observed their weakness, and learned from their mistake. Each one of them are
great in their own way but for me to actually idolize them and try to be like
them kills the whole idea of being my own person. You take wisdom from all
area which is presented to you not just one. When you look up to someone and
expect the best out of them and they don’t come through you just dug your own
path to the road of disappointments. No one is great everyone bears many flaws…
Look up to yourself and expect great things from yourself. You live with your
choices and the people you choose to trust. No one else does for you. Simple.

-Maria Alam

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